I wrote a book this morning. Like, literally, this morning. It’s called “Nothing But Blockchain: Everything You Need To Know About Money Grabs, Bubble Markets, and How Hype Sells Things”:

I was inspired by an article this morning about a company that changed their name to include the word “blockchain” and immediately saw a 500% increase in their stock price. The newly cristened “Long Blockchain Corp.” makes iced tea (they were The Long Island Iced Tea Corp. previously). This is the latest entry in the surreal-but-very-expected hype cash-in maneuvers by people who want to capitalize on the ignorance and excitement of people who just learned what BitCoin (and blockchain) was a week ago, and can’t stop posting dumbass memes about how rich they’re getting literally 7 days after buying a millionth of a BitCoin.

Before that, companies that make bras, e-cigarettes, fruit juice, and literally dozens of other things hopped on the blockchain bandwagon and saw their stocks soar.

So I figured, why not write a book all about blockchain? Like, literally nothing but the word “blockchain” repeated for 300 pages.

It’s the perfect gift for that scuzzy uncle or frat brother or other person in your life who won’t shut the fuck up about cryptocurrency and blockchain, despite knowing nothing besides its current valuation according to yet another out-of-date exchange ticker’s approximate guess.

I did it for you. You’re welcome.


Much of what has been written about me remains true to this day, except that part about the one thing, you know what I'm talking about, don't pretend you don't

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